How to Release Negative Thoughts and Receive Positive Thoughts to Heal Trauma

This blog post will be interactive. I will guide you through an exercise to connect with your thoughts and feelings about yourself that stem from negative childhood perceptions. The aim of this exercise is to assist you in processing and letting go of those negative thoughts and feelings immediately, allowing you to reframe them and feel lighter and more at ease by the end of this blog.

Thoughts (Negative)

Reflect on your childhood and recall moments when your parents were displeased with you for actions or words they didn't approve of. Do you remember how their disapproval felt?

What NEGATIVE THOUGHTS came to mind when they were displeased with you?

Foolish. Unloved. Defeated. Did you feel like you let others down? Did you experience shame, guilt, embarrassment, humiliation, or feel undeserving of love? What feelings resonate with you now that reflect your emotions during your youth? How did these experiences influence your development into adulthood?

How does that feel? Embarrassing, sad, frightened, lonely, and so on.

Behaviors

What types of behaviors resulted from those negative thought patterns?

Concealing, deceiving, covering things up, evading, embodying the "golden child," and pleasing others to evade punishment or the disappointment of failing yourself and your parents. Reflect on how you handled those thought patterns and the accompanying emotions.

How does that feel? Sad, incorrect, unpleasant, burdensome, and so on.

Skills

What skills did you acquire as a result of these negative thought patterns?

Dodging issues, concealing your true feelings, pretending, playing the victim, indulging in self-pity, keeping excessively busy to avoid confronting difficult emotions, excelling in sports or academics, criticizing yourself internally? Perhaps you turned into the "I don't care" child. "If I constantly let my parents down, why bother trying?"

How does that feel? Upset, detached, burdened, and so on.

Priority

What were the priorities for you, or what did you value as a result of those thoughts?

Did you appreciate solitude and isolation? Perhaps you valued solving problems independently, without considering others' viewpoints or experiences. Maybe you placed excessive importance on others' opinions or statements. Did you prioritize trusting others more than yourself? Perhaps you focused on excelling in everything you undertook, striving for overachievement. Reflect on those negative thought patterns and emotions.

How does that feel? Unhealthy, disappointed, trapped, and so on.

I Am

Create some "I Am" statements about yourself using this pattern.

I feel sorrowful. I am exhausted. I am isolated. I am mistaken. I am flawed. I never measure up. I am unsuccessful. You understand what I mean. Continue, reflect, and express it in your own terms here.

What does that feel like? Keep in mind that these are negative thought patterns. Identifying and processing the negative is crucial. Awareness is the first step toward healing. Acknowledge them, then experience them. I understand this is difficult, but it improves. Trust in this process.

Spirit

Consider what your spirit is engaged in within this thought pattern.

What hue does it possess? Does it emit any fragrance or have a particular feel? Perhaps it is black, cloudy, dark, bleak, sorrowful, solitary, and shattered. Is it burdened and weighty?

How does that feel? Reflect on it and use your own words and emotions here.

Connection to Higher Self/God/Divine/Creator/Spirit/Universe

In light of these negative thought patterns and emotions, I encourage you to sincerely evaluate your connection to your spiritual higher self or your relationship with God/Divine/Creator/Spirit/Universe. Use whichever terms resonate with you.

Perhaps you're disconnected, or it's far away, nonexistent, just beyond your grasp.

How does that make you feel? Sad, isolated, powerless, adrift. Express it in your own words.

Connection to Higher Self/God/Divine/Creator/Spirit/Universe

Alright, now that we've explored those negative thought patterns and emotions, I want you to take the opposite approach. Recall a specific moment when you felt strong, capable, happy, healthy, alive, and connected to your Higher Self/God/Divine/Creator/Spirit/Universe, feeling good.

Reflect on it and consider it personally.

How does that sensation feel? Joyful, lighthearted, enjoyable, liberated. Focus on this positivity and remain in this moment for a while.

Spirit

How is your spirit present in this space? Describe it.

Moving to the rhythm, singing, engaging in play, vibrant and full of color. How does it feel? Joyful, liberated, entertaining. Express it with words. Immerse yourself in the sensation. Pause here for a while. Enjoy and absorb the positivity.

I Am

What is your identity?

I am joyful, liberated, kind, cherished, lovely, powerful, competent, and entertaining...etc. How does that sensation feel? Allow yourself to bask in this positive feeling for a moment.

Priority

What do you find valuable here?

Relationships, personal well-being, wellness, positive thinking.

How does that feel? At this stage, you know what to do. Continue advancing with positive thoughts and emotions. Allow yourself to personally experience this exchange of feelings.

Skills

What are you excelling at in this area?

Engage in communication, be present, assist and serve others. Continue onward. How does that feel? Joyful, healthy, authentic, strong, and more.

Behaviors

What actions are you taking? What activities are you engaged in?

Assisting, showing kindness to myself and others. Expressing my needs and desires. Establishing strong, clear boundaries, enjoying laughter, dancing, singing, having fun, etc.

How does that feel? Pleasant, healthy, wonderful, etc.

Thoughts (Positive)

Satisfied. Meaningful. Engaged. Intelligent. Virtuous. Competent.

How does that feel? Genuine, joyful, competent, powerful, and so on.

Thank you for taking the time to engage in this process for yourself. This is one of the exercises I conduct with my clients in person. It's something you can incorporate into your daily routine. I encourage you to create some 3x5 cards and practice this exercise regularly. I promise you will experience a transformed life by integrating this into your self-care routine. Love yourself and speak kindly within your mind. Take steps to lift yourself out of pity and despair. Partner with your Higher Self/God/Divine/Spirit/Universe/Creator to become the best version of yourself that you deserve!